Sunday, October 24, 2010

Okay, so we didn't go to Sunday school...but we didn't go fishin'!

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At the pistol range, Ashlea liked the 9mm while Abby liked the .45(that's my girl), okay I'm kinda partial to the 1911 .45 myself. Neither cared for the .357 or the .380 one was too much and the other not enough, but that's okay. At the rifle range both enjoyed the 1942 Winchester M1 Carbine. Both girls made me proud and hit what they was aimin' at! They passed on the AR-15 and the 30.06 and I can understand why, last time I shot the ought 6 I hit the paper at a hundred one time and said that's enough for me!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Funnies

At a school in the USA, the girls in their early teens had just discovered lipstick.
They would go into the female toilets to apply it.
Then, giggling, they’d leave the imprint of their lips on the large mirror.
This made a lot of extra work for the cleaning staff.
The head teacher asked the girls to stop.
Of course they ignored her.
So she took the girl’s to the female toilets for a demonstration.
She said, “It takes a lot of work to clean the lipstick off the mirror.”
She said to the janitor, “Please show the girls how much work it takes.”
The janitor put the mop in the toilet, squeezed off the excess water and washed the mirror.
Then put the mop in the toilet again, and repeated the process.
From that day on there was no more lipstick on the mirror.

These have been around before but still funny.

Having served his time with the Marine Corps,a man became a school teacher and before school started he injured his back. He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't even noticeable. On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in the school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window wide and sat down at his desk. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he took a stapler and stapled the tie to his chest. He had no trouble with discipline that year...

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Next:

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Another cowboy poem I hope you will enjoy!

Friday, October 15, 2010

Inspiration

Emotion sometimes breeds creativity. Last night I was watching a movie that touched off a fit of inspiration/creativity. Half way through the words started to flow and pen and paper weren't that far away so I started jotting them down. If you don't at that precise moment they tend to get lost forever. So this was the result. It ain't cowboy but it is poetry.

Those Things

All those things I never got done,
The impossible things, the improbable things,
The things that I had just begun.

Those things for which I always seemed to never have the time,
The incredible things, the regrettable things,
Those things I selfishly thought were mine.

The things I found in myself that I lacked,
Those perceivable things, those retrievable things,
The things I would break or crack.

The things that seemed like they came from above,
Those adorable things, those deplorable things,
Those things that you brought me with love.

Robert Lea Lovejoy
October, 2010

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Perhaps a tune then?

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Thought maybe a little singin' might entertain (damn little).

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Lotsa time between words!

Ya' know...I ain't one to just go slobberin' off at the mouth if I ain't got something good to say. That kind of palaver just wastes my time and yours. So I guess I'll just refrain unless something really excitin' comes along. Just hang in there with me and I'll try to make it interestin', even if it ain't every day!

How about this then!

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Well, I'll give this a try...ain't got too many comments on my other junk so maybe this will draw some. Or...might be that I'm the only one who really cares, about my junk. Can kinda get that somehow! Oh well, we keep tryin'...perhaps!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Story lines

Okay so I promised I might produce a few lines from one of my books, so here goes, hope you enjoy.

Jack Johnston, Private Dick

I awoke with the taste of “urinal cake” in my mouth. Don’t ask how I knew. The smell of stale vomit and fresh urine invaded my nose. Upon checking, both were mine. Fingers on both hands had made the discovery about the same time. Thought about trying to get up, was having difficulty making the legs work. Someone or something had worked me over pretty good. Must have asked the wrong questions somewhere. Swell, the day was starting pretty much like all the others had recently. Aside from that missing front tooth my tongue had found, the others seemed in tact. I groaned, vocal chords still worked. Shoved up with the elbows and came to a semi-sitting position. Worked better than I thought. Well, the stomach contents were already spilled so that didn’t bother me when I gagged on the stench. Nothing left to come up, or so I thought. Funny how these things never go as planned. Oh well, the shirt was in need of dry cleaning anyway. What’s a few more chunks more or less? “Hey, the Sox won again”, I perused as I wallowed in the trash. My bookie would be pleased, I could finally pay him what I owed him and get him off my back.
Legs were still wobbly but trying to seek an upright stance. “Come on, you can do it.” The drain pipe was handy so I used it to help my rise. Leaning gave me stability and kept my legs from buckling. Hoped that brick wall was in better condition. Gazed up and down the alley. Wasn’t one I recognized and I knew plenty. Rather dark where I was, more light at either end. Opted for the closer of the two. Pushed off hard in that direction. Stumbling was a way of life for the time being. I got used to it. Glad my feet kept up with my vision of “the way” and didn’t redeposit me onto the asphalt again.
Hailed a taxi at the curb. Took a minute to check if I still had my wallet. Still there. Not much folding money and I knew he wouldn’t take a check. Hoped it was enough for the ride, I didn’t feel like playing rabbit. Wasn’t too worried about it. Gave the guy the address and leaned back into the cushions for the ride.
Whoever she was had left a pleasant calling card imbedded in the head rest, Channel #5. That fragrance seemed to change with the particular body part that it was applied to. Inside the elbow was definitely a different aroma than the backside of the knee. It may have been due to the proximity of the prize. Body heat sent the smell to another level. The hotter she got, the more she smelled. I had tasted every one. Well, I must be feeling better, those thoughts were back again. Began to recognize some things whizzing by the side glass just as we pulled to a stop in front of my building. I had a buck left after the fare. Stumbled up the stoop and into the foyer. Hoped the elevator worked, my legs couldn’t take the stairs.
Nice lady got in on the third floor. Same perfume as the cab. Thoughts were rambling again, but the wall I was leaning on held most of my attention at the moment. The fifth was mine and I bid her farewell. Two doors down and on the right. Fumbled for the keys…the keys…found them. Went through a half dozen before “bingo” and the tumblers fell into place. The door swung open as priorities fell into place, first more whiskey and then the couch. I heard the first snore then blackness.
Must have laid there motionless till I stirred with a full bladder, was sore with some parts still asleep. Left arm was numb and didn’t work very well. Found the john and let her rip. Felt good just to have a decent whiz. Mind wandered as the toilet splashed. Must remember to let Mrs. Waverly know her husband was “not” fooling around with another woman. That’s what she paid me for. Wondered if she wanted to know that he was fooling around with a junior exec, who was rather effeminate. Oh well, take the money and run. Guess she would pay for another insight into her hubby’s dealings on another occasion. That would put beans on the table. Never had let ethics stand between me and my wallet. “Damn, peed on my shoe!” Rubbed it on the back of my pant’s leg. Shook it twice and flushed. Was careful not to zip certain things up in the zipper. Could get bloody.
Couldn’t quite shake a certain aroma. It wasn’t the pee on the trousers leg. The closet held a couple of choices that hadn’t quite made it to the cleaners yet. Grabbed the blue pinstripe and a fresh shirt. Would save a shower for later. Belly said it was time.
Pizza box on my desk didn’t hold anything too enticing for breakfast so I turned my thoughts to the diner across the street. Cute little red headed waitress was always teasing me with something or other. Two could play that game.
I slid into my favorite booth as she brought a menu after working it over with her pencil.
“I just scratched what you like,” she sassed.
“Well, wash your hands and bring me ham and eggs anyway,” I told you two could play.
She stomped off in a huff and yelled back over her shoulder, “Coffee?”
I just smiled and she just shook her hips menacingly as she ducked behind the counter. "Might have to give that a try sometime.”
After I gobbled down the goodies I found the rumpled pack and the last cigarette. I lit it and eyeballed the red head.
She caught my gaze and strutted over for the perfunctory “Anything else?”
I decided to push my luck and see if the waters ahead would be smooth sailing or rough seas. I shoved my hand up her skirt. She smirked and turned so my hand came to rest on the prize. After an inappropriate pause, I gave her a little pinch and she cleared the table and shot me a grin from ear to ear. Guess that meant calm waters and full steam ahead.
The morning paper lay in the booth beside me so I gathered it up for a read. Lots had happened overnight while I lay indisposed. The headlines were a mix of “fashion faux pas” and penny ante hoodlum games. Was still garnering the printed word when she returned to fill my coffee cup from across the table. Then the words struck a chord.
Mrs. Jonathon Waverly III had come to a rather unexplained end last night. She was found stuffed in the dumbwaiter at the Waverly estate. “Strange.” The kitchen help and the rest of the staff were being questioned but had all been released. Mr. Waverly, the third, was nowhere to be found and the police were also seeking the whereabouts of a certain junior executive who had frequented the estate as of late. “Wow, how interesting…and a shame!” She had been my bread and butter for several months now, must look into another “cash cow” in a hurry. Nice lady, rather na├»ve.
Smiled at the red head and headed for the door. After adding to my tab, she ambled that direction too and when I opened it she said “I get off at three.”
“I’ll be back.”

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Procrastinator 2

Well, the video didn't take so we'll try this again.
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Procrastinator

Okay...I have been a little remiss in my blogging of late. Between my kids, my grandkids, writing a little poetry, writing on my books (got 3 started), playing a little guitar and singing, my days seem to get spent. When I was a kid time dragged by from Monday till the weekend, now it speeds by before I even know its gone. Oh well, old age ain't for sissies! Picture is of me feeding the ostrich, hungry little devil too. I took the family camping down at Dinosaur Valley State Park in Glen Rose, Texas this past weekend. Saturday morning we headed to Fossil Rim Wildlife Park to gawk at some critters and feed a few. Got a video i might try to upload of the grandkids feeding the giraffe. Hi-larious! Might even share a page or two of some of my books. Some of the stuff ain't half bad!